Q: Theory of cry it out?

Posted Wednesday, January 30, 2008 9:47 PM

Q: What exactly is the theory behind cry it out and why it works? Even though I know it works, it does feel a little cruel.

Dr. Jodi Mindell, PhD: I don't like the term "cry it out." To parents, this means "put the baby in the crib, lock the door, and leave them alone." No one does that -- it's impossible. I like to call the method "sleep training."

The whole point of sleep training is to have babies learn to self-soothe and put themselves to sleep. It's not about teaching them you won't come if they scream. The important thing is that they fall asleep on their own -- it's a habit and a skill. If you never put a baby in their crib awake, they'll never learn to fall asleep on their own.

And remember, wake naturally anywhere between two and six times during the night. If they learn to put themselves back to sleep at bedtime, they'll be able to do it at one a.m. After a few weeks of sleep training, they'll naturally be sleeping through the night.

As long as your baby is loved and nurtured and cared for during the day, a few nights of crying for half an hour won't lead to any problems. Your baby probably cries that much during the day anyways, even if you are responding. 

Dr. Jodi Mindell, PhD, is the author of Sleeping Through The Night: How Infants, Toddlers and Their Parents Can Get a Good Night's Sleep, and the Associate Director of the Sleep Center at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia.
 


Posted by Paula K
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Comments

re: Q: Theory of Cry It Out?

so there are adults walking around who never learned to fall asleep on their own? REALLY? they are still being nursed and rocked to sleep?

how can a sleep "expert" actually claim that a baby will "never learn to fall asleep on their own" if you don't put them down awake and let them cry?

this is a patent falsehood and drives me crazy!

Posted by readytobedone    Thursday, January 31, 2008 9:10 PM


re: Q: Theory of Cry It Out?

Obviously a person will eventually learn to fall asleep on their own, but babies DO need to be taught this, otherwise they turn into children who have issues falling asleep on their own. It's not a "patent falsehood". You're trying to be too logical in order to make your aurgument, Nest Paula. Do you really want to have to stay with your child until it falls asleep from now until they are in their teens? Because it happens!

Posted by Purrrfect433    Sunday, February 03, 2008 7:36 PM


re: Q: Theory of Cry It Out?

I don't think there is anything wrong with leaving your child in their crib to cry for 10 minutes.  As long as you know they don't need anythigng else, I believe sometimes you have to do this to train them to sleep.

Posted by kimmie700    Thursday, February 28, 2008 12:30 PM


re: Q: Theory of Cry It Out?

Yes, there are adults walking around who never learned how to fall asleep on their own.  It doesn't mean they need to be nursed or rocked to sleep - but that they still have a hard time "self-soothing" and getting themselves to the point where they can fall asleep easily.  I'm speaking as an adult who has this problem.  Even when I'm extremely tired, it takes me 30 minutes or more to fall asleep once I'm in bed with the lights out.  I asked my mom, and she never allowed me to self-soothe.  She always held me until I was asleep, and then when I was older, she obviously didn't hold me, but it still took me forever to fall asleep.  Maybe it's not related, maybe it is.  All I know is that DD goes into her crib awake every time, doesn't cry anymore (sleep training took about 2 weeks for us) and is always asleep within a minute or two, and I envy her ability to put herself to sleep, because I still don't have it.

Posted by luckiestwife    Monday, March 24, 2008 4:29 PM


re: Q: Theory of cry it out?

Babies can be trained to "self-soothe" and fall asleep on their own.  Some families find that this technique really works for them.  For this momma, however, what I want my baby to learn at this point (6 months old) is that when he cries, I'm right there for him.  When he's hungry, I'll feed him.  When he's bored, I'll play with him.  When he's cold, I'll put a blanket on him.  When he's tired, I'll help him to sleep.  I don't need to train him; I just want him to be exactly who he is.

Posted by amypylee    Tuesday, April 29, 2008 12:10 PM


re: Q: Theory of cry it out?

I tried the cry method. My daughter no sleeps almost 10-12 hours. Granted it tough!! Its been a week now and I can't believe how sleep deprived we all where. Its still new so she hasn't mastered falling asleep on her own yet. There are still tears but we are getting there

Posted by twohearts    Saturday, May 03, 2008 6:57 PM


re: Q: Theory of cry it out?

i think "sleep training" is ridiculous.  read the current literature...the current research.  i have yet met a single adult that needs to be rocked to sleep by his/her momma.  it's an absurd comment.  really...

Posted by bbowie    Sunday, June 08, 2008 11:51 PM


re: Q: Theory of cry it out?

We're trying a CIO method starting tonight. I swear, I have used every AP method I've been able to get my hands on and NOTHING is working. This was a last resort, and we're there. I've been realizing that I was allowed to CIO (and pretty early on) and I'm a perfectly normal, well-adjusted human being (much better adjusted emotionally than any of my SIL's, and they were never allowed to cry). No, I didn't have attachment or emotional shutdown issues, no, I don't feel as though I've been scarred by my parent's decision. So, here goes.

Posted by IryssaHarperson    Thursday, August 28, 2008 12:06 AM


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